Larry

This is a story about a parasite named Larry. Larry is quite the lady-killer.

This story is not based in fact, but it is based in reality. It is based on experience and guesswork from many non-medical-professionals.

We believe that Larry originally entered the body of a lovely blond intern through a questionable mango.

From that point his charm and charisma spread. Not only through the body of said intern, but onto door handles, faucets, water bottles, and into the bodies of other lady-interns. Larry doesn’t discriminate; all lady-interns are equally vulnerable to his charms.

That being said, Larry does have a special relationship with each of us. The lovely blond intern is in a long-term relationship with Larry. She can’t seem to get out of it no matter how much anti-parasitic medication she takes. Our resident ginger was lucky enough to have Larry interacting with two holes.

It comes as no surprise to me that my personal relationship with Larry was short and intense. Fevers and chills racked my body; I was constantly dripping cold sweat. At one point the feelings were too much to handle; I passed out and came to in child’s pose on the concrete.

The moral of the story is that we need to get out of these destructive relationships. We deserve more than Larry.